Building strong relationships isn’t a luxury for leaders, it’s a necessity. But too often, professionals feel overwhelmed by the sheer volume of connections, unsure of which relationships to nurture. Quite frankly, they are too busy with business operations to prioritize the efforts.

The book Relationship-First Strategic Engagement emphasizes that strategic relationship prioritization is essential for making informed decisions and ensuring effective engagement. A well-structured relationship strategy turns a chaotic list of contacts into an engine that fuels relationship-driven growth, influence and long-term success.

In this post, we will walk you through two essential steps to build your relationship strategy, helping you go from overwhelmed to organized with a clear plan for relationship-building.

Step 1: Creating the List of Relationships to Nurture for Strategic Relationship Management

One of the biggest hurdles in strategic relationship management is simply getting started with the list. Chapter 3 of Relationship-First Strategic Engagement lays out a structured approach for determining which relationships should be included.

Segment Your List: Who Belongs?

Your relationships should be grouped into three core categories:

• Existing Clients: The goal is to retain and nurture top-tier clients to increase loyalty and encourage advocacy.

• Prospects: Focus on a list of no more than 25 contacts to build meaningful, trust-driven relationships.

• Strategic Partners: These are your referral sources and industry connections that bring opportunities to your business​.

If you’re unsure where to start, begin by asking which of these relationship categories feels like it’s currently under-nurtured. Some people feel that they have strong systems in place to nurture existing clients but are unable to stay connected with strategic partners.

Others feel like they aren’t doing enough to proactively nurture prospects and create relationships with them. Our suggestion is to start with one category instead of trying to implement better processes for all categories at one time. You’ll be able to add on as you smooth out the first group.

Identify Your Top Segments

Whether you’ve decided to focus on your existing clients, your prospects or your strategic partners, segmenting that list to a reasonable number of relationships is going to be the key to success.

At The Expressory, we leverage something often referred to as The Dream 25 System. It is a focused approach that recommends nurturing no more than 25 key connections at a time. This number ensures you can engage with depth and personalization rather than spreading yourself too thin​.

For your existing clients, you want to identify your top, high value relationships to help with building client relationships. While the other clients can remain on the list to nurture, the top ones would receive more frequent engagement and higher value touchpoints.

For your prospects, if you’re not willing to invest at least $1,000 per year per contact, they probably don’t belong on this list. They should be that valuable to your company when converted, in order for you to invest your resources in the nurturing process.

For strategic partners, you want to focus on those who have connections that match your target, high-value clients. Nurturing relationship-driven growth with these contacts should have the potential to provide leads, and lead nurturing best practices are just as valuable as the prospects you’ve identified as your targets.

No matter which category you’ve chosen, you’ll want to start by reviewing your existing CRM for any of these potential contacts. Expand that to your current LinkedIn connections.

How to Fill the Gaps in Your List

Once you’ve reviewed your own database, you’ll likely find gaps in your list of 25. This is where you’ll begin to use outside tools to complete the list.

You’ll need to start by identifying the key characteristics of your ideal clients:

• Look at your most successful client relationships and find patterns.

• Use this information to create a "lookalike" model for new prospects​.

• What industries best align with your services?

• What is the typical size of companies you serve? # of Employees.

• Who makes the purchasing decision? What is their title?

Use Digital Tools for Expansion

Once you can list the criteria above, you’ll be able to use platforms like LinkedIn Sales Navigator to find the remaining list of contacts for nurturing. Plug in the information you documented and let it run a search for you. The key thing you’ll want to do with this step of the process is make sure that you can identify the actual decision-maker, not just the company name.

Verify their role through multiple sources before adding them to your list.

Now You’re Ready to Engage

With your structured prospect list in place, you’ve taken a critical step toward predictable, relationship-driven growth. No more scrambling to find the right people or wasting time on unqualified leads—now, you have a clear roadmap of high-value prospects, clients or strategic partners who are worth your time and attention.

But a list alone isn’t enough.

Now, the focus shifts to intentional engagement, the actions that move your relationships from passive contacts to meaningful connections. This doesn't mean jumping in with a full-blown strategy overnight, but rather, starting small and thoughtfully.

Put Thought into Your First Engagement

Before reaching out, take a moment to consider:

✔ What does this contact value most in their business relationships?

✔ Have you engaged with them in the past, and what was the context?

✔ What insights or support can you offer that align with their needs?

The goal isn't to sell right away. It’s to connect in a way that positions you as a trusted resource, not just another name in their inbox.

Consider a Simple First Step: Send a personalized message commenting on a recent achievement, industry update or shared interest. Or, if you're nurturing an existing client, acknowledge a milestone in their business.

This isn’t about volume, it’s about depth.

As you begin to engage with your list, pay attention to what resonates and adjust your approach accordingly. The most successful relationship-building efforts are those that feel natural and personal, not forced or overly structured.

Five Questions Every Business Leader Should Ask Now

As you start putting your list to work, take a moment to reflect:

• Am I focusing on quality over quantity in my relationship-building efforts?

• Have I identified my Dream 25 prospects, clients or strategic partners?

• Do I have a clear system for tracking and evaluating my key relationships?

• Am I investing enough time and effort in the right relationships?

• How will I update my list to reflect changing priorities and new opportunities?

Taking the time to structure your relationship strategy is one of the most powerful things you can do for your business. By starting with a clear, focused list, you eliminate the guesswork and set yourself up for intentional, meaningful engagement that drives long-term success.

If you need support refining your relationship-building efforts, we’re here to help.

Frequently Asked Questions

How do you choose between focusing on prospects, clients or partners?

Start by identifying your biggest business gap. If your churn is high, focus on existing clients to strengthen building client relationships. If your pipeline is dry, focus on prospects and implement lead nurturing strategies to keep your outreach consistent and meaningful. If your goal is more high-quality leads with less effort, focus on strategic partners and use strategic relationship management to maximize impact. We recommend mastering one category of business relationships for 90 days before adding another, as this method supports relationship-driven growth.

What is the minimum investment for a high-value prospect?

According to the Relationship-First Strategic Engagement methodology, if you aren’t willing to invest at least $1,000 per year per contact in the nurturing process, they likely don’t belong on your Dream 25 list. This approach aligns with lead nurturing best practices and ensures your efforts target prospects whose lifetime value justifies a high-touch, personalized strategy within your strategic customer relationship management framework.

How often should you update your relationship list?

Your list should be a living document. A quarterly review helps identify which relationships have moved from “prospect” to “client” or which strategic partners are no longer aligned with your audience. This keeps your lead nurturing strategies and building client relationships efforts efficient and relevant, supporting long-term, relationship-driven growth.

How do you reach out without sounding like a salesperson?

The key is value-first engagement. Instead of a direct sales pitch, share a relevant industry article, congratulate them on a LinkedIn milestone or offer an introduction within your network. This method enhances strategic relationship management and positions you as a trusted resource, aligning with lead nurturing best practices and sustainable relationship-driven growth.